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All actors must audition with one of the monologues below. If there isn’t a monologue for the part you are trying out for, just pick one from below that best illustrates what you think the character should be.

Don:
(Making a speech to an adoring crowd.) Well, Dora, I've had one motto which I've always lived by: Dignity -- always dignity. This was instilled in me by Mum and Dad from the very beginning. They sent me to the best dancing schools.... Where I net my lifelong friend .. Cosmo Brown. And with him, I used to perform for all Mum and Dad's society friends. They used to make such a fuss over me. Then, if I was very good, I was allowed to accompany Mum and Dad to the theatre. They brought me up on Shaw and Moliere. The finest of the classics This stimulated my love for performing, and to this we added rigorous musical training at the conservatory. In a few years, Cosmo and I were ready to embark on a dance concert tour. We played the finest symphonic halls in the country.

Cosmo:
(Talking to Don) What's this one about? A French Revolution story? (See’s it in his head) I've got it. You're a French aristocrat -- she's a simple girl of the people -- and she won't even give you a tumbull. Why bother to shoot this picture? Why don't you just release the last one under a new title? if you've seen one, you've seen them all.Come on now, Don. Snap out of it! You can't let a little thing like this get you down. why you're Don Lockwood, aren't you"? And Don Lockwood's an actor, isn't he? what's the first thing an actor learns? The show must go on. Come rain, come shine, come sleet, come snow, the show must go on. So remember Short people have long faces. Long people have short faces. Big people have little humor and little people have no humor at all! And in the words of that immortal bard, Samuel J. Snodgrass, as he was about to be led to the guillotine MAKE 'EM LAUGH.

Kathy:
Leave me alone. Your a criminal. I've seen that face someplace. You're a famous gangster. I've seen your pictures in the papers -- or in the post office, with a lot of numbers on your chest. (Takes a closer look) Wait a minute… Your Don Lockwood (hides exitment) Uh-Mr. Lockwood--I can't tell you how sorry I was about taking you for a criminal before -- but it was understandable under the circumstances. I knew I'd seen you even though I don’t watch your movies. Oh, no offense. But you see, I'm not interested in the movies. I guess it's entertaining enough for the masses, but the personalities on the screen don't impress me; I mean, they don't act -- they just make a lot of numb show... Acting means great parts, wonderful lines speaking those glorious words...Shakespeare, Ibsen...Well I am an actress.

Lina:
You won’t do nothing R.F. You wouldn't want to call the papers and say Lina Lamont is a big fat liar! (Very pleased with herself) Ya see I gave an exclusive story - to every newspaper in town. You can’t control me any more, What do you think I am? Dumb or somethin'? I had my lawyers go over my contract . Yeah and you know what I found out… I control my publicity -- not you. Yeah! And the studio's responsible for every word printed about me. And if I don't like it, I can syoo! And if you tell the papers about Kathy Selden, it would be (Very grandly, like an elocution student) "Detrimental and deleterious to my career." I could syoo you for the whole studio. It says so right here. (Shows HIM) Contract dated June 8, 1925 -- paragraph thirty-four -subdivision letter .A -- the party of the first part -- That's me!

R.F.:
Don, Lina, come here. (to the crowd) Ok everybody Save it! go home! We're shutting down for a few weeks! (reacting to upset crowd) I know, I know but we have a problem, it's the The Jazz Singer, It's a sensation. The public is screaming for more! More Talking pictures! I know I said it was just a freak but We should have such a freak at this studio! I told you talking pictures were a menace, but no one would listen to me. we've got to put our best foot forward. We're. going to make "The Dueling Cavalier" as a talking picture.
Every studio is jumping on the bandwagon, All the theatres are putting in sound equipment. We don't want to be left out of it. Don't worry it should be simple, It's a picture! You do what you always did ... You just add talking to it. It will be a sensation! (with a grand guesture)"Lamont and Lockwood" -- They talk! We're going to rush this thing through -- shoot in three weeks -work day and night! Warner Brothers, watch out! Monumental Pictures will soon be making musical movies and motion picture history.

Dora:
(At microphone, highly excited in an over-ecstatic, gushy voice) Hello, out there!T his is Dora Bailey talking to you in front of Graumann's Chineis Theatre in Hollywood. Every star is here to make Monumental Pictures' premiere of "The Royal Rascal" the outstanding event of 1927.We are breathlessly awaiting the arrival of its two great stars, Lina Lamont and Don Lockwood.(reacting to crowd) No, no, ladies and gentlemen, that was not them. That was the famous zip girl, the darling of the flapper set, Zelda Zanders... and her new red hot pash, J. Cumberland Spendrill the Third. (as an aside) This is her ninth marriage. I know this time it's really love. (The CROWD reacts with a unison "000H") The noise you have just heard is the arrival of that exotic star, Olga Mara. Aa..Here's the happy newlyweds, little Mary Margaret, America's darling, and her new husband.They've been married two months already. And they said it wouldn't last. The stars keep pouring in, anticipating the arrival of tonight's glorious stars. Is it… is it… yes here they come now.









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